If the Coffin Fits by Lillian Bell

Author:Lillian Bell
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Crooked Lane Books

Chapter Eight

The next day, Orion and I hunkered down in the Element and watched the parade of minivans and SUVs driving up to the school, pausing for a minute, then driving off. I kept looking at Iris’s photograph and up at the line, hoping I’d be able to pick out Vodka Mom from the pack.

A knock on the window make me jump. Orion barked. I accidentally hit the horn. I turned, ready to start cursing at whoever had snuck up on us. Then I saw who it was. Luke freaking Butler. I rolled down the window. “What are you doing here?”

He leaned onto the door with his elbows and said, “That’s exactly what I was going to ask you. We got a report of someone lurking on the side streets near the school watching the children go in and out.”

I looked around. Who had reported me? I saw a curtain twitch at the house across the street. I made a mental note of the address. I’d find out who the busybody was and I’d … Well, I didn’t know what I’d do. That was for later, though. I needed to get Luke away from me now in case Vodka Mom showed up. “I’m not lurking. I’m sitting.”

“Apparently that looks pretty lurky to some people. Why are you sitting here anyway?” He peered into the car as if there might be some contraband.

I slid the photo of Vodka Mom under Orion. “Just reliving the glory days of elementary school.”

He squinted at me. “Well, relive them someplace else. You’re making people nervous.”

That was the moment I saw Vodka Mom pull up. At least, I thought it was her. It looked like the right van. Green minivan with a slight dent in the left front fender and a scrape on the back. Maybe driving around sipping vodka out of your travel mug led to some fender benders. “Okay. I’ll go.” I pushed at his elbows to get them off the door.

“What’s your hurry?” He didn’t budge.

“Oh, I don’t know. Being accused of being a pedophile. I figured it would be best to leave the situation.” Vodka Mom had pulled up to the curb.

“No one said you were a pedophile. They said you were lurking and watching the kids.” Luke made a face. “You always overreact.”

“And what did you think they meant?”

He stood up. Finally. I put the Element in drive. He shook his head. “Desiree Turner, if you’re up to something …”

I waved and pulled out into the intersection as Vodka Mom pulled away from the curb. “That was a close one,” I told Orion. He settled down onto the photo.

Vodka Mom drove exactly like a mom should. She signaled every turn and lane change. She came to a complete stop at every Stop sign. She drove the speed limit. She certainly didn’t drive like she was drunk or even buzzed or about to bounce her dented minivan off of anything.

She drove down Oriole and turned onto Sparrow and then into the Civic Center parking lot.

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